What do you say to someone who is dying?

I’m almost 30 years old and have no idea how to cope with death. But I need to figure out how to deal with it. Like… now.

This is my aunt Annie and she is dying of cancer. She’s in her final days, maybe even final hours. Knowing that I’ll never see her warm smile again in person is beyond heartbreaking.

I love you!!

So what do you say to someone who is dying? Because I have no idea…


  1. Rosanne says

    I lost a father (age 64) and sister (age 46) to cancer and have had cancer three times myself. Sometimes you don’t need to say anything- just sit there and listen if she wants to talk. That is what I did for my sister as I was her primary caregiver. If she was your favorite aunt,-tell her. She knows she is dying. Be comfortable and relaxed around her. Death is nothing to be afraid of.- It’s normal and natural except in this society where people think they are going to live forever if they eat right and exercise. People die at all ages under all circumstances. If they know they are loved they can be at peace. I am a nurse who was also a grief counselor for mom’s who lost stillborn babies. . Whatever you do -don’t stay away. If you spend time with her you will also be at peace.

  2. says

    Treat her the way you have always treated her and nothing less. Listening and being there for the person is sometimes the best medicine.
    .-= Beth´s last blog .. =-.

  3. Peggy says

    First I want to say how sorry I am to hear of this news. Cancer is such a terrible thing. My mother passed away in March after a 7 month battle with cancer. Tomorrow, August 1st the the anniversary of when we found out she had cancer. To think we found out a year ago, and she’s been gone for 4 1/2 months, makes no sense. All I can say is to be with her when you can. Share those precious memories with her and remember that even though she may not appear to be alert, hearing is one of the last senses to go, according to what hospice told us. Hold her hand and enjoy the precious time you have left. You will see each other again, have comfort in knowing that. I love the picture you posted.

  4. Lori Barnes says

    You tell them you love them so many people don’t get that opportunity and tell her how much it means to’ve had her in your life. I’m so sorry for what you’re going threw. My sister-in-law died during childbirth then my brother died, i do know what you’re feeling, except we didn’t know ahead of time. I wish so much there was a cure for cancer it has taken so many lives. I’ll say a prayer for you, sending you a hug….hope you felt it.

  5. katherine says

    Be there, be normal and tell her that you love her. Reminice. Remind her of all the wonderful times you have spent together. I lost my mom 4 years ago this month. She was 58. She too had cancer. It is a horrible disease that robs its victims of so much. It sucks. (((((HUGS)))).

  6. Vickie Couturier says

    As a former Nurse an have lost family members of my own,Ive been told that hearing is the last sense to leave the body,so saying I Love you so much,an a kiss would be good,or just say whats in your heart,as my Dad was dying he was only 62,I actually climbed in the bed an held him in my arms an told him how much I loved him an I would take care of Mom an not to worry,we didnt want him to leave us but If he had to,he could go in peace knowing he was surrounded by his family an Loved so much,was it hard,oh yes! I am crying as im writing this an he died in 1997,I just told him to to toward the light an he just went peacefully,an I NEVER regret that moment with him,an it helped saying goodbye,I hope this helps you some hon

  7. says

    I’m SO very sorry to hear about your Aunt:(

    death is never easy and I’ve dealt with a LOT of it in my family/friends…Just make sure you tell her how much you love her, spend time with her and focus on happy times you’ve had.

    My prayers go out to you and your family.

  8. says

    I have no idea other than I LOVE YOU .. my aunt spent my first FIVE years with me and she died when I was five. I have not had to cope or be in a situation of a close family member dying. I would just have to say I love you and spend as much time with them as I could. I am sending you a HUG to get through this, as I know you can :-)
    .-= Brandy´s last blog ..Review: Rosie Hippo Wooden Toys =-.

  9. says

    I’m so sorry, Mariana. We’re praying for you and for your aunt. I hope you find whatever gives you peace and comfort, and I hope that you are able to talk to your aunt and tell her that you love her.
    .-= Tara @ Feels like home´s last blog ..Gimme, Gimme! =-.